How to Start Planning a Wedding
Most advice on how to start planning a wedding sends you straight to a budget spreadsheet or a venue shortlist. Both are easier once you know what the two of you are actually buying, and that takes one conversation before any figure exists.
Write two lists before you set a budget
Separately, write down what you each care about. Do it apart rather than together, because the second person to speak tends to agree with the first. The lists are rarely symmetrical. One of you may want generous flowers because every wedding in your family has had them, while the other has never thought about videography and would not miss it.
Compare the lists and fund by priority
Where both lists agree, fund that properly and stop apologising for it. Where only one of you cares, that person protects their item and the other protects something else, which keeps the trade honest. Where neither list mentions something, you have found your savings, and you can cut it without either of you feeling overruled.
Do this before you contact vendors
The order matters. Once quotes start arriving, they set the terms of the conversation, and it is easy to allocate money by reacting to whichever quote made you feel something. Having the lists first means the quotes get judged against your priorities rather than the other way round.
Key Takeaways
- Start planning a wedding with a priorities conversation, not a budget
- Write your two lists separately, then compare them
- Fund what you both want, and let each person protect one thing the other does not care about
- What neither of you names is where the savings are
- Have this conversation before you request vendor quotes
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Source: onefinedayweddingexpo.com.au